10. I wrote it. And that is, like, totally, um, you know, like, really, kind of, uh, amazing.
9. It's only $15. There's almost nothing you can buy for that cheap that will give you so many hours of pleasure and satisfaction. As we all know, chocolate will never last as long as a book.
8. You want to help send my kids to college. (In 15 years.) And consider this: I will make $1 for every book sold. That ought to make you want to buy LOTS and lots of copies.
7. The whole first page is about the main characters vagina. Tell me that isn't very cool.
6. I don't write about war, famine or poverty so you don't have to worry about getting depressed reading the book and having to spend more money on pharmaceuticals. In that way, I kind of SAVE you money. It's like therapy. For only $15.
5. You might be on the acknowledgements page. Then you will be famous. And you will want to own a copy not steal one from the local library.
4. It's really very funny.
3. I told my editor I have so many friends the book will be a bestseller instantly from email contacts alone. It's up to you to prove me right.
2. Some other important people (like the amazing Elinor Lipman) read it and think it rocks. Which is useful information. At least I'm not a self-absorbed narcissistic neurotic. (I'm just neurotic.)
1. Because. You love me. The best reason of all.